Belize Day Five: Problem Solving

Today had less than fortunate events, but this group is great and Roberto is a phenomenal guide, so it’s nine pm now at night and I slowly rock back and forth in this well-loved hammock, happy as clam. 

It started out early with hints of being a hot day.  By the end of breakfast we were sweating.  We meandered around Punta Gorda for about ninety minutes searching for souveneirs, and I’m glad we did since I had to buy some prizes for the picture contest.  We had had breakfast at the delicious Snack Shack, which seemed to get heavier in my stomach with each passing minute in the heat.  Someone had the brilliant idea to look for hand fans.  I found some in a China shop and bought one for everyone in the group.  They were a huge hit.  

We then headed out of town for our cultural village stay.  After an hour of driving in the jaguar on bumpy hot road, we came to the Garifuna village af Barraca.  Alvin, our local guide met us to check us in to our guest house rooms.  I thought it was good luck we weren’t actually doing over-night homestays, there are some people in the group that wouldn’t have handled that well.  However, after everyone was checked in, Alvin notified me that there was a funeral taking place in the village that day and many other people had come into town for the event.  Extra safety precautions must be taken, but we would also get the exciting chance to view this rare event.  Exciting.  I asked a bunch of necessary questions regarding cameras, attire, etc., but especially about how long we’d be standing out in the sun.  It must have been over 100 with high humidity.  Someone was bound to drop if we were out for too long. 

We trailed behind the funeral procession and reached the top of the hill where the dead man was to be buried.  People of black and brown skin stood all around dressed in all different levels of attire.  They chanted the Hail Mary led by no one other than a white Roman Catholic priest.  It was distasteful.  It was distasteful because it was a perfect example of how a Caucasian male-dominated religion came in and reduced the culture of a much more earth-bound society to nothing more than additional fodder for their own bullshit preachings.  So much life and soul and history was in the teachings of those original tribes and now only a few of those customs remain.  The rest have been scrubbed and scratched and whipped and mutilated out of their generations.  Burying their dead by some other man’s protocol.  Despicable. 

We didn’t stay for long, and continued on back down the hill for lunch.  It was nothing special:  coconut soup, mashed plantains that tasted of and had the texture of mashed potatoes, and fish.  I opted out of the fish and had barely any of the plantains.  It was too hot to eat, so the skinny skittish dogs luring about got most of what little lunch I had taken.  By this time we were pouring sweat and relieved when Alvin told us we had an hour to sit out the hottest time of the day, maybe go swimming off the pier.  Chrissie came back moment later to icksne that idea on the argument that the water was too dirty, which it probably was.  So it was back to boiling in our own sweat.   Of course, Andy was nowhere to be found, he had the keys to the bus our refill of water was locked inside.

As we sat there, Alvin spoke of the evening’s safety while we watched more and more people congregate at the back of a bus near one of the neighbor’s homes.  They all held beers.  This was not safe and chrissie rightly expressed her concern.  We needed a night watchman.  Andy is a terrible asset to Roberto and when he finally showed up, snickered when I said we needed a watchman and was a pain in my ass when I asked him to take me to the local sheriff.  I met the sherriff, who was equal parts a low life and disgusting man, and asked him if he knew of anybody that night that would be of sound mind, good character, and worth the pay to watch our property.  The only man he could think of was dead.  I knew it would not be good for us to stay in town. 

I walked back and, as I approached the group, Chrissie must have read my mind and suggested we go back to PG that night.  Sounded good to me.  I demanded Andy’s cell phone, called Roberto, and arranged to head back then rather than finish the rest of the day tour.  It was just too hot and miserable for everyone.  Executive decisions sometimes have to be made and that was the safest option. 

On the ride back, we stopped by a river to soak our feet while a couple of the girls jumped in.  We also had the opportunity to stop one more time at Ixcaocao for some more chocolate.  When we arrived back in PG, Roberto was extremely apologetic though none of it was his fault, and showed us to a wonderful hotel even adorned with a pool.  Spectacular.  He couldn’t have done better and is truly an amazing man.  For dinner he showed us to a pizza place that was alright, nothing special, and waved us goodbye with excitement for Keyes snorkeling, beach fun and bbq, and manatees in the morning.  Everything but weather he would make sure he had control over.  The man is truly a saint. 

This photo needs to have fire exploding from the house windows and the car blowing up.  Doesn't it look like they're striding straight out of an action film?

Let's play I Spy the white preist that doesn't belong.  Cameras weren't allowed but I couldn't help myself.  You're not a good photographer if you're not risking getting kicked out of places.  

 Allie is the most compassionate person on the whole trip.  She was so worried the puppies weren't hydrated enough that she shared her water rations with them.